Tag Archives: wanna hang out

this week, nbd.

Crikey!  The level of stuff going on in life has reached an all time high.  So much stuff.  So many stuffs.  Too much stuffing.

For starters, we move into our sweet NEW HOUSE on Friday.  And we couldn’t be more excited! Like I mentioned last week, I’ve been a little nervous about talking about it until it was 100% confirmed.  But last Thursday our loan was finalized.  We have yet to sign the papers, but that should be happening in the next 24 hours.  So.  We have a house.  We move in in 3 days.  In other words: WHAT.

Can I just take a second to talk about how amazing the house buying process is?  I mean, how cool is it that you really don’t know for sure if you have a house until a week before you’re supposed to move in?  Talk about funsies!  I’m totally kidding, of course.  House buying can suck it.  Luckily we have a kick ace realtor who totally held our hands through the whole process.

I shouldn’t complain, because a HOUSE!  Gus cannot wait to have a backyard to run around in. And I cannot wait to have a spot to plant my brussel sprout.  And two bathrooms (am i right girls?)  And no shared walls.  And a dining room that isn’t our couch.  And a doormat…. preferably the one that says “Hi. I’m Mat.”  So many things.  Gah!  I can’t wait.

On top of that small life change, I’ve also quit my current job and accepted a new one at another ad agency.  The new agency is the Everest of ad agencies.  It’s a place I read about in college and never dreamt I’d get a chance to work at as a big kid.  I’m basically freaking out in all possible ways – excitement, nervousness, disbelief, hunger….  It’s all happening.  I feel like Maya Rudolph in Bridesmaids, when she’s waddling across the street in the wedding dress.  But instead of poo-ing myself, I just have diarrhea of the emotions.

So basically, in two weeks our life will be flipped turned upside down, Fresh Prince of Bel-Air style.  My brain is shot, my nerves are fried and I have a constant headache just north of my unibrow.  But I seriously couldn’t be more excited…

Now, please send me all your boxes and your money because I’m moving and I need to buy some STUFF!


i like you. do you like me?

You know when you’re little and all you have to do is offer some Big League chew to your hide and seek partner and you have a friend for life?  Well, try that when you’re 27.  For starters, you can’t find big League Chew anywhere.  And secondly, they don’t offer hide and seek as a group class at 24 Hour Fitness.  But you get the picture…

Having moved to a new city with my husband less than a year ago, we’ve found that making new friends is way harder than it used to be.

When you’re in elementary school, everyone is your friend.  I think that’s also part of the sugarcoated kid philosophy that “everyone is a winner”.  Then in middle school, you flit in and out of groups based on how long it takes to get your braces off, or when you have your growth spurt or if you have early or late lunch.  But by high school, you’ve established a group of best friends you’ve now known for years that you have similar classes, sports, and interests as.  And by the time graduation rolls around you see your friends way more than your family.  (That’s also because parents are supes lame in high school.  Amiright?)

Enter college, when life is one big blind date and party rolled into one.  All you have to do is meet someone at a house party, have three too many drinks, and you’re declaring your friend-love for each other.  “You like wearing sweatpants?  I like wearing sweatpants!  We have to hang out this weekend.  You’re my new best friend!  Give me your number, I’m calling you tomorrow!  I’m sorry, I should totally know this, but what’s your name again??”  Come on, we’ve all had those conversations that make you cringe a little the next morning…  And while most of these encounters may not stick, the sheer amount of times they happen guarantees that you weed out at least a few besties from the plethora of crazy.

Cut to your late 20’s, when even one too many drinks equals three consecutive days in bed and a morphine drip.  (Not really but totally)  You can’t rely on parties and cocktails to make you “feel friendly”, as my best friends and I used to say.  You have to find new ways to meet people.  And once you do, it’s almost as if you’re dating them… First it’s asking if they want to get a drink.  If you’re lucky, you find that you actually like them and a few happy hour dates may eventually lead to a dinner.  And before you know it you’re standing outside the restaurant wondering if a hug would seem like you’re coming on too strong.  And you’re thinking “I really like you but I don’t want to seem like I really like you because I don’t want you to think I’m weird and scare you off”.

Adding another layer of difficulty is the fact that it’s not just me anymore.  As a married person I tend to hang out with my husband a lot (marriage happens like that) so there is also the desire to find couple friends.  And don’t even get me started on those first dates, because now not only are you wondering if the girl likes you, you’re also wondering if the guy likes your husband and the husband likes you and the girl likes your husband.

Sigh…. It’s exhausting.

Almost a year deep into our life in a new city, I’m realizing that the easiest way to approach friend dating is to use the word “friend” more loosely.  It doesn’t need to have the same meaning that it did in high school and college.  It actually shouldn’t have the same meaning it did back then.  As long as I still have my best friends, regardless of where we all live, there’s no pressure to find someone in my new city to get matching tattoos with quite yet.  Priorities change and people change so it’s okay to be a bit pickier, but it’s also okay to realize that you don’t have to love each new person to infinity-and-beyond… just so long as they have the same adoration of sweatpants that you do.  Well, sweatpants AND bloody mary’s.

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